Monday, September 25, 2017

Mosquitos don't even deserve a blog post!

I get that mosquitos are part of the food chain.
That they are food for bats, frogs, lizards, spiders, some birds and probably many more dietary deviants that I am not even aware of.
They are necessary.
(I typed the previous sentence with my eyes closed because if I don't see it then it's not true)
Recently I became a significant part of that food chain too.
I am a buffet item for them.
Have mercy!
I am contributing major tissue* donations on a daily basis to this circle of life and will probably pass out before I finish this post.
Since hurricane Irma bashed up my little part of life here in Florida, the mosquitos think it's Mardis Gras or Spring Break or the Running of the Bulls or OctoberFest or La Tomatina or some such other party that I can't relate too because I am not big on crowds, large pointy bovines or vegetables in my hair.
That is why the sun is out and I am inside at the computer.
I am sitting at the computer scratching like a yard dog trying to soothe the itch of bites I didn't know I had.
It is 85 degrees right now and I am wrapped up in a double thick throw that is my temporary mosquito armor.
One consolation though is that these hurricane mosquitoes are huge.
Well, not huge like blue whale huge, but big enough that if they were domesticated could be kept on a leash.
As a pet.
If you like quiet blood sucking pets that won't bark at your neighbors or require a pet deposit at your rental.
Because who has time for grooming and teaching things to roll over?
But gratefully because of their immenseness, the hurricane mosquitos are easy to spot and exterminate.
So after my son and husband declare war in the front room on the little buggers that squeaked through the screen door after we quickly get groceries out of the car, the scene looks like a blood filled paintball fight that lasted way too long.
Then I, yes I alone, spend the next 20 minutes trying to remove the bloody squashings from the wall that must be cleaned up immediately because if the spots are left for more that 15 nano-seconds, they bond to the wall like paint does on a battleship.
Squashings and insect death everywhere.
It is truly a scene from a nightmare.
Don't know why I thought you should know this.
But there it is.
Covered with bumps, itching and a splat of blood.

Thanks for being here.
Be careful out there!

One of my resident but mostly useless pond frogs who is clearly more interested in showing off than catching mosquitoes.
(No bloody squashed mosquito pic for this easily queasy blog.)

*Yes, blood is a tissue. I had no idea of that till I did a little (very little) research on the good old inter web. Now you know it too!
Mosquitos: Your educational resource!

1 comment:

Rachelle Culpepper said...

Tis true! The hurricane stirred up the devil beasts in a fashion never seen by the likes of me before! I have so many bites I look like I have chicken pocks! Damn dirty apes...I mean mosquitos!