Saturday, December 20, 2014

The Christmas Shopper.

The Christmas Shopper.
A Poe-m by Sherry R.*

Once upon a morning dreary,
While I wakened, weak and bleary,
Over many a gift bought and wrapped from some vile store,
While I coffeed, nearly napping, suddenly I felt like slapping,
As if somehow my brain was slapping, trapping me to buy some more.
"Tis but some bauble" I quickly muttered, "slapping me to buy some more.
Only this and nothing more."

Deep into the morning peering, long I sat there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no shopper ever dared to dream before:
But the silence was unbroken and the coffee gave no token,
And the only words there spoken were the whispered, "Shop some more."
This I whispered to myself and murmured back."Shop some more."
Only this and nothing more.

Then 'Free Shipping' so enticing, and the bid of 'Low, Low Pricing'
Those chosen words now burned into my bosom's core.
No other words dare need be mentioned,
To grab my wallet and attention,
Till I scarcely only question, "who do I still need something for?"
"Is there someone?", I implore, as my resolve goes out the door.
One more dollar and nothing more.

But I soon discern my bill is climbing,
The thrill of gifts is past it's priming.
I now resolve to stop this madness I adore.
The siren voices must stay quiet, as they stalk me like a diet,
Beckoning and calling "Buy some more".
While my resolve is quickly sinking, back to the 'inter-web' I'm linking,
All the while my brain is thinking, "My cash has vastly flown the door with
something destined for a drawer, yet..."
One more gift and nothing more.

Then I ponder in lonely torment my frightful snare with my urge to repent,
Over gift temptations I have tried to bypass much before.
Is aid soon needed by a master to help avoid complete disaster,
And keep my downfall from occuring faster,
Than it has so swiftly done in days of yore?
"I will be wise, no compromise, I know that I am not a bargain whore.
I am the boss of my wayward brain and can handle all the strain to make my budget last and keep the score."
I will not faulter, vows the shopper. Vows the shopper...
"Nevermore."

It won't happen again, gone are checkbook and pen.
And the credit cards used on gifts so many times before.
The oath is no joke and it will not be broken,
As the season outspoken, begs, 'Spend some more!'
Now resolve is like a fire burning and "no more debt" is still a yearning as from my shopping ways I'm learning not to ring up gifts and treats galore.
The cash it helps to keep it real and curbs the staggering appeal of swiping the card in the oft offending store.
No more bills, debts and crying, no more statements for hiding, no more charges that I regularly ignore.
The snare must loosen up it's grip, as I bite hard upon my lip and as I constantly...defiantly quip...
"Nevermore."



I wrote the previous poe-m after a shopping day that completely overwhelmed and derailed me from the wonder of the season.
When despondent, I always think on Edgar Allan Poe and it is with considerable gratitude that I thank him for his masterful version of this poem, The Raven.

*Thats me!

Thanks for being here.


Ravens at Christmas



The Christmas Shopper Poem © 2014

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Godzilla Nativity

Hello faithful readers.
Yes, I know the REAL meaning of Christmas and I adore it.
That is why I had a little fun today.
Think I will make Christmas cards with these pics.
Some possible sentiments include.....

IT Came upon a Midnight Clear....
or
Don't Rest ye Merry Gentlemen.....
or
O Come all ye Flameful....
or
Hark, the Feral Lizards Sing...
or
Wreck the Halls...

You get the idea.
Maybe you'll get one!!!

You're Welcome!


Godzilla Nativity


Godzilla Nativity


Godilla Nativity


Thanks for being here.

Friday, December 5, 2014

Understanding a Gift.

I have not discovered the Fountain of Youth or become a giant Redwood tree but including this year I have celebrated 245 Christmases with my husband.
In dog years that is.
We have had a dog or dogs most of our entire married life and consider it an honor for them to leave muddy paw prints all over the house be in our lives.
Every day is Christmas for a dog and dogs are easy to buy gifts for.
Give them one tennis ball or several, new or even badly used, and they celebrate with wild abandon, as if no one ever gave them anything else before.
Husbands are a bit more discerning and although they are very much like dogs, I have used up every thoughtful and creative gift idea in my universe during our 245 Christmases together.
I am totally not inspired to shop for my husband because if he wants something he usually just buys it himself.
So doesn't that means he has everything he wants!?!?
If I actually do think of something that would be a fun gift then it is usually about the same price as a new Lamborgini, and we all know bloggers have bags of expendable income generated by thousands of advertisers and loyal readers.
That is our reason for blogging.
Not because we are trying to type away our stress or perhaps psychoanalyze our day to day world, hoping it will in some small way, make a bit of sense.
Pppfffftttt. Whatever.
Back to husbands and dogs....
Both are laid back and easy going.
Curled up on a nice comfy chair or sofa, they both fall asleep in seconds and snore loudly.
Hmmm...Got enough chairs and sofas.
Both eat just about anything.
My husband however, does not just barf on the carpet if he eats too much.
Hmmmm...Got enough food.
They both leave their stuff everywhere because they are easily distracted........Squirrel.......
Hmmmmm...Got enough socks, hats, shoes and yard animals.
Both sleep ALL OVER the bed.
Arms and legs in every direction and both dogs and husbands will strangely try to snuggle even closer to you if you push an arm, leg or tail out of the way, so you just give up and try to go back to sleep in an unoccupied space about the size of a bandana.
Hmmmmmm...Got a bed and plenty of blankets.
Not to mention the amount of hair that is shed by husbands and dogs.
And husbands don't take kindly to a good lint rolling on their chest to gather the excess.
Hmmmmmmm...Got LOTS of lint rollers, vacuums and showers.
Both dogs and husbands are fun to be around and happy most all of the time with a "Glad I woke up, what are we gonna do now?" attitude every morning.
Hmmmmmmmm...Got enough coffee, mugs and projects around the house.
Husbands and dogs are just happy to be noticed and have a companion to play with, seems like to me.
Hmmmmmmmmmm...
So much in common..... except....
Dog gift = easy.
Husband gift = aaarrrggghhhh... or....
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....
Maybe I'm thinking of this gift thing all wrong.
Maybe I can't think of the gift because ANY gift would be considered G R E A T.
Because for dogs and husbands most every day is like Christmas when you have the balls to celebrate with wild abandon.

Merry Christmas.

Thanks for being here.



The Husband.